His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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