Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
