You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
