After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
