We need to rekindle our bromance
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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