He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
now i know why i became what i already was.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize