You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Your shirt... Was in my pants
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
