Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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