My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
