:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
