You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
