Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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