ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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