The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
