A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
