Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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