I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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