So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
