I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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