I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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