even my farts smell like vagina
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
