Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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