forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
your like the ambassador to my penis.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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