Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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