wrigley field is MILF paradise
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
