i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
