I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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