I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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