We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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