was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
