Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
