have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
