So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i think i have herpe
just one?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
