so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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