Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
time to smoke my breakfast
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
