Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
