Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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