from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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