you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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