12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
