The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Someone signed my nipple.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize