we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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