i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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