I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
