I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i dont even know how to be here
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
