Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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