Nicole vs. Life
love makes seman taste better
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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