who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize