So drunk its hurt
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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