If that was your dad, he is hot
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
